exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2016-01-16 01:15 pm

A Sense of Comfort

It was a night I looked for comfort
It was a night I needed to feel

I looked everywhere for something
I looked everywhere for you

I knew you could give me what I needed
I knew you could talk me out of this sadness

I could never find you
When all I needed was to see you

The darkness drew closer
Slowly swallowing me whole in a corner

All I needed was you
But I guess this silver blade would do
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2016-01-13 10:41 am
Entry tags:

Who is 'Me'

You don't know me
I make art with the blood from my wounds

You don't know me
I greet the moon with my tears

You don't know me
I bleed myself dry of happiness

You don't know me
I live in a house I cannot call home

You don't know me
So how can you say you that you are in love with me

You don't know me
But if by some chance you do get to know the real me without the bullshit

Please, don't run away from me.
When you get to know me, tell me who I am

Because the saddest part of no one knowing you is not knowing who you are
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2016-01-11 12:33 am
Entry tags:

Devil in Dreams

I was in between dream and reality
I didn't know which is which

When I felt that warm caress on my face I looked for it
Then that warmness went else where
Somewhere it shouldn't have gone

I thought sleep protected me
And as I was under that false protection I waited for you to stop
And be the person I thought who you were

But that protection only gave you a chance to be the devil that you are
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-12-26 12:20 am
Entry tags:

Burning Line

When this started i didn't know what I was getting into.
You were a friend.
Then things changed, the sad thing is I alone noticed the change.

You've created a line we cannot cross.
Instead of being on the same side I am stuck opposite from you.
And though you try to give me enough of what I need.
I let greed swallow me whole.

I wait for the day when you meet someone new, someone well suited for you.
And I ask myself "Will that be the same day you'll get tired of me?"

It is such a terrifying question to ask.
But still I'll take the chance
For it'll be your answer that will decide my death.

Will I die on the other side as I watch you live your life
Or do I get chance to be with you on that ever so hopeful side.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-04-29 10:53 pm
Entry tags:

Just Do It

The next time I hear you say “I want to die!” I would personally put a knife on your throat and make you think twice about the idea of dying.

A person doesn’t just say he wants to die, not out loud. If you’re going to do it, just do it I hate to sound like a Nike commercial but that’s just how it is, plan it and do it why do you need to let the whole world hear it? So their attention can be focused on you? So no matter how absurd your reason is the will sympathize with you because you make them think you’re giving up on your precious life? Life that you’re trying to convince yourself that is worthless but deep inside you know you’re too scared to let go, to have that last breath, because to you the regret seems to be too much for you to handle. Some one who is tired of their lives and wants nothing to do with it anymore is also tired of all the bullshit that people are trying to tell him, they only have one goal: Die, right away. No need for goodbyes, no need for any statuses, nothing, they just do it.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-03-10 09:51 am
Entry tags:

Worse than Me

They tell me to cite my reasons
But can lies be reasons too

They try to make it better
But how can they when better is already gone

I am on a deserted island
Desperate and alone
Still looking for someone
To fill this big black hole

They say I am dangerous
That they have to save me from myself
But how can they
When they've already hurt me worse than i already felt

One thing I can say
I just want to be free
From pain and this world of rot and death
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-03-02 09:39 am

Bleed Bright Red

I thought it would hurt
As I glided the blade across my skin I felt nothing
Yet I thought of everything

The numb feeling drove me crazy
And the color of blood brought me closer to ecstasy

Physical pain is no more
But emotions are here to stay
Hiding
Haunting

It's hard to tell them what it's like
Because their world is much colorful than mine

As I bled bright red
I came closer to the feeling of death

Peaceful
Gentle
Quite
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-02-20 07:47 am
Entry tags:

NO WAY OUT

Leave, while you can. Because I'm too fucked up for you.

But selfishness overweights equity, so I say nothing and leave your affection be even if it cost you a bleeding heart.

So I'm sorry.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-02-20 07:42 am
Entry tags:

No one's there

I keep looking behind my back. Being paranoid as fuck. These past few days I've been reading post's on reddit, and everything is keeping me up. Do you know that feeling when you keep thinking of something, imagining things and you feel like they're actually there. That keeps happening to me. And it fucking up my sleeping cycle.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-02-10 01:46 pm
Entry tags:

A short thought…

There are a number of people who say they are who they are. But one must remember that those who point that out the most, the people who insist they are what we see them are the ones who have a numerous number of masks and skin they hide behind.
The people who are closest to us are not as honest as we make ourselves believe they are. Do you know the reason we keep up acting so ignorant? Is because, we are like them. No one is an exemption to deception. Everyone does it to protect themselves and only themselves. Deception is what’s made this world as it is and deception shall bring it down.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-01-21 11:33 pm

Spineless

In the book trilogy of A Great and Terrible Beauty, there's this main character, everything revolves around her. The book keeps making her look like the hero, the cause of everything, the protagonist. But for me it doesn't feel right. Gemma Doyle is a weak woman. Yes she has the power of the realms but she's not exactly the one in control, she lets her friends push her around, her friend felicity seems more like the protagonist. She orders everyone around but she has the sense of responsibility and courage Gemma needs to have. The reason why Gemma achieved everything she has done sine the first book is because Felicity and the people around her told her so. And as I keep reading that book, I kept thinking I am like her. I am my own Gemma Doyle. I act like the Hero but in reality I'm not. I only act when I'm told so, I can't act on my own. I over think my decisions causing me to stop and do nothing. Because I don't take risks. I only act like it.

I'm fake.
I'm a robot.
I'm nothing without the people around me.

I am not my own master.
exposedskin: It would be an honor to be a tree that is a slave to the moon (Default)
2015-01-17 02:31 am
Entry tags:

One

A sudden urge was felt as I walked back to my place. I kept thinking about the things that kept happening to me and how I let it happen, no matter how unfair it was. I am not the kind of person who is good at saying what they are feeling. I cannot express myself properly to those who need to hear it. I grew up in an environment where opinions of a child do not matter, all you need to do is to sit, listen and agree.

I am getting sick of it, but courage does not come when I need it. I am too buried in my many fears that I forgot how to act. So instead of keeping it all inside me, which might make me lose it, I would rather write it down and show it to everyone else that might care.